Letter to my daughters
Things I will teach my daughter about relationships:
Contrary to what is preached in the movies;
- Never discuss your past with your current partner. They will throw it in your face if you have a disagreement
- Never talk about your parents/siblings with your partner. It will be used as ammunition if you ever get in a fight
- Never share your deepest insecurities/childhood traumas with your partner. If you ever make a mistake, they will blame it on your past
- Seek to have a solid financial base, independent of your partner. If you ever rely on anyone, they will ensure you never forget who is feeding you.
- Love and have confidence in yourself regardless of your relationship status. Being in a relationship does not make one whole
- Money and financial stability is everything. Do not be fooled by the notion that money does not buy happiness. It buys respect and a sense of freedom.
- The only person who will ever love you unconditionally is your mother. Your father will only acknowledge you when/if you meet their standards of success. On rare occasions, an African father may try to play the ” role” of mum – but rarely
- People will love you as much as they can benefit from you. If you ever lose a high paying job/title, the calls will dwindle down to nothing. Do not take it personally, that is human nature. So work hard to be someone.
- Always trust your intuition, it will never steer you wrong
- When you love, do so unconditionally and without expectations. If they do not appreciate it and put you down for it, remember points 1-9.
You’ll never get out of this life alive. So live your best self, do not try to impress anyone, and above all, love yourself. The power is all yours
Love, Mum